I’m a Beirut-based translator, copywriter and loving mom of two. I love reading and writing poetry and fiction. I also firmly believe in the power of the Word as a catalyst of change and awakening in our modern world. I’m especially enthusiastic about mental health awareness, social pressure, female empowerment, human rights and advocating for persons with special needs.
You may reach me on:
Instagram: @translationista
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/zeina.elhoss
Blog: http://zeinaelhoss.wordpress.com
Photo credit: Ignacio Campo
Can’t Reason with Love
By Zeina El-Hoss
I’m good at naming feelings
and noticing their signs
I can point out “anger”
when my face flashes
in every shade of red
Eyes protrude marking their targets
ready to fire on sight
Veins pop out
outgrowing my skin
like branches shooting upward
from my collar bone to my chin
But I can reason with anger
in a soothing attempt
to curb the lashings of my tongue
I pull out a deep breath from
the tip of my core
Anger can learn to calm itself
I can point out “sadness”
and feel the dampness
of the pillows my heart has cried on
Wring the tears out of
every shirt in its closet
and hang it out to dry
Then vacuum its chamber
and dust off every memory
and open all the windows
so light and air can roam free
But I can reason with sadness
as I write eulogies and bid farewells
to my old self, to my lost self
and come to terms with heartbreaks
separations, disappointments
Slowly but surely
moving on is a skill I’ve mastered too well
Sadness can learn to find a way out of the black hole
And though I can point out “love”
and feel the silky smoothness
of its velvety red cape
as it embraces my soul
hanging down to my soles
draping me with comfort
whispering sweet nothings and
empty promises written on papers
as proof of eternal confinement
“I will love you forever”
while forever has come and gone
and though I can see every illusion
glaring at me, like August’s sun
I still can’t reason with love
I can’t seem to convince it to leave
It keeps trashing my eviction notice
and I’m a naive landlord
for tolerating its worn out welcome
I can’t reason with love
and perhaps I don’t want to
tame it or break it or bend it to my will
Love can’t be reasoned with
or coaxed into leaving
Only blindly accepted
and allowed to,
gently, violently,
wreak havoc in your heart and mind
Photo credit: Rene Bohmer
Inside, Outside
By Zeina El-Hoss
Inside there’s quietude
An uninterrupted hush
Outside there’s a bustle
Everyone’s in a rush
Deafening car horns, chaos
Construction cranes, drills
Inside, thoughts on mute
A numbness and a chill
Overwhelm my senses
Eyes gazing into open space
And a sudden warm blanket
Spreads across my face
Tears, pouring without sound
Slipping through my fingers
Splatter on the ground
Outside, the chaos resumes
People walk by indifferently
No one looks up to my window
I watch but they don’t watch me
Only the sky joins in my sorrow
The clouds gather like sheep
Summoned by the shepherd
Then they begin to weep
I thank the sky for its sympathy
Nature is far kinder than Man
Inside, life ceases for moments
Everything turns pitch black
Outside, life moves forward
Like a train on an endless track
Outside, umbrellas and puddles
Little children chased by rain
Inside, a dull uninvited headache
Hammers at my brain
For the first time ever
The rain can’t make me smile
This untimely change of weather
Mimics the fickleness inside
Outside, the first rainfall
Inside, the last chapter ends
Outside, a new season
Nature is a mistress of pretense
Inside, we’re still very broken
But move on like we’re just bent
Photo credit: Ben Blennerhassett
Insomniac
By Zeina El-Hoss
Night falls, I lay my head to sleep
then the sedating silence is broken
as thoughts begin to creep
Guilt calls, saying “It’s been a while
that we haven’t gone over failures,
or the memories you had as a child”
Sleep’s gone, and so has the peace.
If only our thought patterns had a switch
I’d turn off the anxieties
I’d rest my head on that pillow
and dive into a sea of tranquility
And while this body is weary
I can’t meet its simple needs
because the heart is roaming freely
and the mind’s agenda impedes
Sleep is a necessity
only when there’s nothing to miss,
when there’s no inspiration to guide you
through a world of writing bliss
Sometimes I envy the oblivious
who are not shaken or stirred
their hearts are void of anguish
their heads are void of words
that they must unload like baggage;
too heavy to carry around
If only I were just as unaware
if only the world just passed me by
without a trace, without a sound
